This study was one that came to me through personal experience of being a member of my research field. Upon arriving at the honors college I quickly noticed the differences between the honors students and the regular admission students. This study discusses the causes of stress in high performance students and shows how the students cope by using different forms of literary outlets.

Field notes

-Bailey, Rachel. “Field Notes #2.” print. These are notes taken during an Honors Colloquim course for the honors college students. These intricately describe a classroom setting that the honors college students attend weekly. It notes the interesting interactions between the students and the professor and how those interactions differ from a regular classroom.

Research Journals

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#1.” print. talks about literary sponsors and how they can mold the use of literacy in a particular person’s life. This relates to the study in that we study the causes of stress many of which could be in relevance to sponsors or influential figures in that particular person’s life.

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#5.” print. talks about my personal use of literary outlets to relieve stress, thus this entry helps to explain how I happened upon the project and how I am connected to the field site. It also talks about my literary sponsors and how they contributed to my literary development.

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#10.” print. helps to describe my field site and how I will begin to conduct research for the final ethnographic project. This entry talks about my demographic and my plans to get the project up and running.

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#12.” print. begins to mold my project more in depth. It lays out the groundwork for interview questions and helps describe taking myself out of the field and beginning to view things in research perspective. This was a difficult concept for me at first but soon became second nature.

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#13.” print. shows my first set of expanded field notes. This entry helps describe the importance of choosing a field site carefully. It also helps to lay out the definition for what literacy is and how it works.

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#14.” print. uses the box activity to help give a vivid and in depth description that is pertinent in observations relevant to the study. Talks about what “surprised” me in the study thus far.

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#18.” print. describes more in depth observations from being in study groups with the honors students. Discusses their perceptions on the “smart” label. Talks about how they use higher level vocabulary and speculates by what means they attempt to appear smart in order to fit their given label.

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#19,” print. is the first entry that mentions artifacts. I collected artifacts from participants of the study and throughout the entry discuss those artifacts and how they are pertinent to the study.

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#20.” print. is where I began the outline for my codebook. I established reoccurring themes that had begun to show throughout the project and highlighted speculations of why they were reoccurring. Also, I began to lay out the groundwork for the table of contents and organization of the project as a whole.

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#22.” print. expands my code book and adds more depth to the project as a whole. These expanded codes help to expose the themes that are strong and those that had not been revealed until this latter point in the project.

-Bailey, Rachel. “RJ#24.” print. gives examples of the literary codes in effect and how they help add depth to the project. It also briefly discusses how the organization of research should not inhibit the research but rather be a means of communicating it when you have collected all your research.

Codebook -book of codes that explains reoccuring themes throughout the course of the project.

Artifacts

-post it note reminders are a key use of reminder literacy among the honors college students, they use this to cope with stress

-written plans for future goals show the different thought process of the honors students and how they plan for the future so that they fulfill their requirements under the “smart” label

-notecard for studying shows the extent to which honors students go to achieve what other expect of them -piece of student planner this is use of organizational literacy to cope with stress, helps the honors student feel more in control -photos from student participants show both organizational methods used by students through their personal calenders, journals, and planners.

-written response to failure are one word answers that students were asked to write in regards to what they think of when they think of “failure”.

Consent forms are forms used to obtain consent from participants to use their information in the study.

Interview script

-Ramos, Chris. Personal interview. 20 November 2009.

-Reece, Samantha. Personal interview. 2 December 2009.

-Tamayo, Laurencio. Personal interview. 18 November 2009.

WA1-WA2- These include the story of my literary sponsorship as well as present the idea for my project on fear of failure and literacy.

WA3-WA4- These include a rough draft of my research proposal as well as a preliminary version of my final mutlimedia project focusing in on one interview.

Notes from interviews- These are notes taken during the interview as well as things written by the interviewee in response to questions in the interview.

Plans for presentation- These include plans for the presentation on Commerce Writes Symposium as well as the Celebration of Student Writing.

Future research- This section includes possible further research that can be done on the subject as well as plans to carry out this research.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

-fieldnotes listed chronologically

-writing assignments listed chronologically including preparations and outlines of writing assignments

-interview notes and interview footage on DVD

-archives, physical aspects of research

-codebook

STR-YOU stress from yourself

ex-honors students feel the need to know the answer or succeed because of what is expected of them

STR-OTH stress from others

ex-stress from peers, they might think less of you if you are not up to par

RML reminder literacy

ex-sticky note, writing on hands

ORG organization methods used to cope with stress

ex-using a planner, calender

P influence from parents or other influencial characters

ex-parents pushing you to make good grades therefore you are held to that standard always

C influence from culture and media, they put stress?

ex-culture says that smart people will succeed thus they are expected to do so

I am currently using four main codes:

STR-OTH-stress caused by others or outside effects

STR-YOU-stress caused by pressure put on oneself

RL-literacy used as a reminder to reduce stress

ORG-organization methods used to relieve stress

I plan to expand codes for the project as I continue to review my research journals as well as compile my research portfolio. These codes help to coin common ideas that are expressed and reoccuring throughout my project as a whole. These codes will definitely help me to identify and analyze the findings of the study as they will relate the separate interviews on common ideas and themes that run between them. Thus far my data is definitely in support of the fact that honors students feel like they are expected to attain higher levels of success and therefore experience stress from both themselves as well as outside sources. These outside sources mostly include family and professors. Trying to please these people is where their selective types of literacy come into play.

The above is my old code book, I have recently added a few more codes which I will detail below. The thing about my research project is that my codes are specific about a broad topic, thus I may not have a need for as many codes as some of the code books I have seen in others projects.

P-influence and stress from life characters of the participants past

C-cultural influence, societal views on stress and failure affect the participants level of stress

I am currently using four main codes:

STR-OTH-stress caused by others or outside effects

STR-YOU-stress caused by pressure put on oneself

RL-literacy used as a reminder to reduce stress

ORG-organization methods used to relieve stress

I plan to expand codes for the project as I continue to review my research journals as well as compile my research portfolio. These codes help to coin common ideas that are expressed and reoccuring throughout my project as a whole. These codes will definitely help me to identify and analyze the findings of the study as they will relate the separate interviews on common ideas and themes that run between them. Thus far my data is definitely in support of the fact that honors students feel like they are expected to attain higher levels of success and therefore experience stress from both themselves as well as outside sources. These outside sources mostly include family and professors. Trying to please these people is where their selective types of literacy come into play. Thus far I have only interviewed one participant, his main use of literacy was body literacy, the use of athletics or body movement to relieve stress.

The East Caney community as it was resided in several decades ago is obviously very different economically and socially than it is today. The speakers spoke about societal expectations of them to be farmers, how the areas in east caney were kept and how this affected those who lived there. The main difference and most intriguing part of the interviews, I believe, was the difference in education. The availability of education is so much more prominent today than it was during this time. One phrase that sticks out is how they describe their limited amount of school supplies. This is very different from the times of today, education has become more of a norm and is often taken for granted in modern times.

Field notes as they are accumultated in chronological order

Writing assignments in chronological order

Bio sheet for five main participants followed by each intro will be artifacts supplied or pertinant to that particular participants story

miscellaneous artifacts, notes, artifact description and other necessities I have collected through time with the project

Mapped out plan for multimedia portion (updated):

I am deciding still whether it might be a good idea to have three partipants that are studied more in depth or if it would be more beneficial to be broad and only have five participants. Thus far I have conducted one interview and am still in the editting process of both my personal intro to the story as well as the clips and audio from the interview. I plan to have an intro that introduces how I came to the project through personal experience with mixed clips of things that involve my stress and how that relates to me. Then with a transition slide I will begin the interview clips with intermitant clips of stress causers, relievers, and outlets that are pertinant to the participant and what they are talking about throughout the interview.

Codes:

STR-YOU-stress caused by pressure one puts on themself

STR-OTH-stress caused by others or surroundings

RL-reminder literacy, things that are used to maintain organization in order to relieve stress

ORG-use of organization to lower stress levels

My project is definitely starting to take shape, the main focus is organizing the different thought concepts and how they will be portrayed in the multimedia presentation. I look forward to getting to learn more about the editting programs and getting a good start on organizing the multimedia presentation to express the ideas that were spoken about throughout the interview. There is a lot of valid information that needs be put in order in the best way to express the idea of the project. Also, I still need to film the intro to the multimedia presentation that will describe my personal experiences and how they led to my study. There is alot of editting to be done and still alot of interviewing to be conducted but I am definitely pleased with where I am at this point in the project.

When dealing with the honors students and those involved with the honors college as a whole we can easily see a difference in diction when comparing those to what is considered the regular student population. The higher level vernacular and expected comprehension level is necessary and expected thus can often cause stress among the honors students. I have noticed that the high level of supposed “necessary” achievement is based (more often than not) on how a person is presented and in result the representation of a person and how they are viewed can be directly linked to the vernacular and “intelligent jargon” they utilize in common conversation. Also words of doubt and the sense of “not good enough” takes over through phrases like “I’ll just quit school” or “I give up”. An outsider might see this type of talk as a white flag to what the student claims they cannot achieve. To an insider, we know that this talk and diction are code for “I will stress myself until this is finished and up to par with what is expected”. These underlying and assumed messages are definitely key in describing diction and how word choice affects the honors students.

Cowhill open mic night

This was definitely an eye opener for me. The literacy of the town is a lot more than what I thought previously and it was definitely an enlightening experience being able to observe it from a researcher perspective.  The one thing that immediately came to my attention was the unrelentless support of the community, the constant applause, the appreciation. This event depicted a lot of what small towns represent. I noticed the laid back feel of the room at all times, there was room for messing up, there was no image of perfection to attain for any of the performers, it was very subjective and nevertheless supported by all who attended. Many of the audience members who attended regularly would speak to those on stage as if they were the only two people in the room. I thought this was very interesting and perhaps something to take note of. The fact that they spoke directly to one another as if in conversation across the room can attest to the fact that they were comfortable in the environment. The embracing of talent and hard work is never-ceasing at cowhill events and can say something about the venue as a whole. The baristas and owner are always very welcoming, adding to the hometown vibe. Cowhill is truly a gem. It holds a lot of the evolving culture that exists in Commerce.

Three graduate Students

It is unbearably apparent that these three graduate students approached the same topic in highly different manners. I was most intrigued by the second essay. This could be because I am a sap for sad stories and feel emotion vicariously or it could be because many of us can relate to the ideas of what the story represented. The manner in which each of the presenters delivered their story mirrored what their story was about. The man of the Mormon Church, trained in speaking delivery stood tall in front of the podium with no guards. His bouldering voice resounded smoothly across the room for all to hear. The second essayist stood guarded behind a podium that protected him from the harsh and critical eyes of his viewers. This could be because of the sensitive subject of the essay or because of his guarded nature in general. The last essayist, unfortunately rushed by time, delivered in a happy medium, leaning comfortably against the never-failing podium and smiling contently while humming a less abrupt but sufficiently loud essay about her experiences both emotionally and professionally.

Chapter 7 Box 30

Analyzing artifacts and history of a particular field site is crucial regardless of its pertinence to history. Knowing the background of your research site is pivotal and can ultimately make or break the outcome of the project as a whole. Knowing how the honors college has evolved can better help me to evaluate the stresses of students involved with this organization over time. This is ultimately what ethnography represents, the history of a place and how it shapes the present day conditions of the field site. Letters from college students writing home about stress could definitely be of use and reference for my final project. Knowing that this is a commonality over the course of time is beneficial to substantializing the different aspects of the study. Simple artifacts can be key elements in a research project and if we observe them as an outside party there can often be much learned from a simple blanket, photo, or letter.

English 102-Honors

October 12, 2009

Research Proposal

Picture this, it’s college, it’s your first social gathering with your new found friends and you are pumped for event! You have spent the last half hour examining your appearence from the part of your hair to the color of your perfectly matched socks. Now you are officially ready to make your first appearence on the college scene. You gather all of your necessities and bolt out the door. Upon arriving at your destination you push back your hair tightly back behind your ear, take a deep breath, and open the door. On the floor sit twleve of your peers, books open, eyes red ,hair a mess, with reminders written on their palms and scribbled deadlines on sticky notes, they have been studying for the past four hours straight. This may not seem like the college party you pictured but it is definitely the reality of many honors college students at Texas A&M University-Commerce. The high stress levels that call for emergency cram sessions like the one described above are influenced by many different factors and call for many different methods of cope.

I will be exploring the often hidden fear of those who are expected to succeed, by asking “How does fear of failure affect literary outlets of the Texas A&M-Commerce Honors College cohort of 2009?” I plan to reveal the underlying methods of cope with this fear as they are expressed through literacy. This might inlude things like: planners, reminders, as well as scribbles, dry erase boards, even doodles. Being a member of my field site is what brought me to question literacy as a relief outlet for stressed and high acheiving students. I can directly relate to the idea that literacy can be used as a coping method. I have experienced the highly demanding stress that is evoked from a heavy and rigorous course load. These not uncommon feeling is what provoked me to ask the question of how others in my place might cope with the same struggle.  I will investigate first what causes the stress, second how students cope with stress, and lastly relate the evidence to literary outlets through a multimedia presentation showing a handful of in-depth interviews as well as images of the literacy being used as a coping method for the students involved with high pressure course loads.

I am currently in the process of drafting permission forms and will be distributing them through e-mail via the dean of the Honors College. I already have willing participants for interviews and plan to interview as many as are willing for information on emotion, stress, and cope mechanisms pertinent to the individual. I will also be capturing relevant images to add accordingly to the multimedia presentation. The organization and order of excerpted pieces of the interviews will be key in the presentation. I plan to organize the video as follows:

Introduction to characters

“What is your biggest fear?”

Clips from each of the five interviews describing the answers to the 3 main points of the presentation: What causes the stress? How do you cope? What literary outlets do you utilize?

The overall interview for the presentation itself will include a near 40 question/answer process. I will be doing in depth interviews with a select handful of honors college students most likely taking place in the apartments and/or classrooms that are so avidly part of their lives. I will not only be interviewing students but other influencial figures (dean, teachers). The process will inlude requests to video handwriting as well as asking questions:

What is your biggest fear?

What is your biggest stress?

What stress do you feel you put on others?

Do you feel like people expect more of you? why?

Name three ways that you cope with this stress?

How do you stay organized? What is your key method of organization?

Does this help you to be less stressed?

The multimedia project will reflect a handful of interviews relating to several in-depth questions. I will also be taking field notes and compiling a research journal in relation to the final multimedia project. Being able to ‘look at my fish’ will enable me to observe the aspects of the research that I may normally not notice. This aspect of becoming a third party observer is key in researching and will help me greatly to not form pre conceived notions about the population. This is definitely key in my study, especially considering my involvement with the population prior to the study.

Ultimately my key methods of obtaining information will be interview, video, and images. I plan to introduce five main characters within the video, all of them being honors colleg students. An extensive fourty question interview will be conducted with each of the diverse five participants. These interviews will be pieced together to convey a synopsis of the responses from each of the participants. There will also be many different images supporting the information found in the interviews. The video will help demonstrate to the viewer the complexity of the study and how the emotional reaction to stress affects the honors college freshman. The field notes will give the viewer a concrete source of information to look at. They will be compiled and organized so that they can be easily viewed, most likely laminated pages     This methodology will reflect the answer to why, what types, and if literacy is a common form of coping with stress for high acheiving students in the Honors College at Texas A&M-Commerce.

In result, the final project will be an approximate ten minute video with available reference resources (research journal, field notes) that will be organized into a conclusive portfolio for viewing. If successful, the video will explain through interview clips, images, and visual commentary the findings of the study. I plan to heavily utitlize the resources within my reach. I plan on meeting and being heavily involved with a graduate research assistant that will hopefully become an avid part of helping me compile results into the multimedia format. Essentially the final project will consist of both a multimedia presentation (an estimate ten minute video) as well as the compilation of written findings as they occured throughout the research process. This end result will hopefully support the theory that honors students (due to their high stress level) use literacy as a coping mechanism.

Interview Questions for Ethnographic Project

What is your biggest fear?

What is your biggest stress?

What stress do you feel you put on others?

Do you feel like people expect more of you? why?

Name three ways that you cope with this stress?

How do you stay organized? What is your key method of organization? What would you do without it?

Does this method of organization help you to be less stressed?

When are you the most stressed?

Is there a specific cause of your stress?

Do you keep a journal, bookd of quotes, something that inspires you?

Who is your favorite writer or singer? Why are they your favorite?

When you have a bad day what is the first thing you do when you come home? why?

Would you say you are a neat freak or a messy person?

Do you think success is a directly related to organization?

What is more important, appearing successful or being successful?

Do you think people are judged by how organized they are?

Do you think you are judged by how organized you are?

Do you write reminders to yourself? (sticky notes, mirror, hand) Why?

Do you feel like you need validation from others?

Would writing the best novel mean anything if it were not published?

When you are assigned a writing assignment , what is the first emotion you feel?

Where do you live?

What is your name?

How old are you?

Who puts the most pressure on you?

DO YOU THINK FEARING FAILURE CAUSES YOU TO SUCCEED?

WRITE ONE WORD DESCRIBING THE FEELING YOU FEEL WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT FAILURE.